Month In Review: FEBRUARY 2018

Word/quote of the month: "Happy birthday"

This is because February is my birthday month (surprise, surprise) - so I've heard these words quite a lot. But I've also really embraced having a birthday MONTH (or a couple of weeks, which in February essentially means most of the month). I've been thoroughly spoiled, and enjoyed some quality time with my friends and family. I've never been a massive fan of my own birthdays - something about the passing of time, and how quickly it seems to go - and had embraced the song, "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to" a little too enthusiastically. But the last couple of years I've really loved my birthdays - surrounded myself with as many of my favourite people as I can, celebrated getting older, marked the passing of a year and enjoyed myself. It's also the time I post my One Second Everyday video on my private Facebook - which is always such a joyful, uplifting and reflective moment.

Healthy/meal food of the month: Roast dinner

While this may not be the most healthy meal in the world, it is one of the best and the most comforting. London has been experiencing a cold snap the last few days with snow and bleak winds, and there is nothing better than firing up your oven to cook a proper roast to counteract any Winter blues. My friends and I have started 'hosting a roast' this past month; we have taken it in turns to cook a big meal for each other. I love cooking for others and a good roast chicken is a crowd-pleaser.

Lesson of the month: I am still surprising myself

A few things happened this month that surprised me - in a good way. When we achieve something that we didn't expect, or had counted ourselves out for we devalue ourselves. This can often harm us, and take some of the glow away from the achievement. While I would never like to go too far towards the other end of the spectrum (and be arrogant and entitled), I do feel I could do with reflecting on why I am always convinced I won't be successful. This is true of not only work life, but also things that happen in our personal lives. When friends and family aren't surprised and believe more in you than you do, then maybe it's time to listen to them! This isn't a new problem of mine - I've talked about self-doubt a lot - including here (at about 2 mins 20 seconds in). But this month has been a reminder that there's always improvements to be made.

Healthy thing(s) to do: Going to the gym

Not everyone's favourite place - and certainly not mine. But the benefits are far too numerous to recount here, and outweigh any number of struggles in getting to the gym. I have talked about gym workouts, how to progress gym sessions, and also how to get back on your feet after being bedbound - so I won't bore you all again with my musings. Except to say that, exercise is a key component of living a healthy and happy lifestyle - and however you get yours - just do it! This month I have been to yoga, been to the gym and gone bouldering. Variety is the spice of life!

Goal for the next month: Focus on my university work and hit the gym more..!

How has February gone for you? What are your goals for March?

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Month In Review: JANUARY 2018

Word/quote of the month: "Just do it"

So, I may have stolen this off a well-known sports brand, but it definitely feels an appropriate misappropriation for this month.

There are lots of occasions in life where you feel hesitant or reticent - but sometimes (read: all the time) it can be life-enhancing to ignore the natural fear - and just do it.

This month I have embraced this motto in many parts of my life - both personally and in my work/study life - and it has been working for me. Not every occasion where I have 'just done it' has worked out the way I thought, or been successful - but I would much rather have tried and 'just done it', than not.

So, if I could make a prescription to you - try saying "just do it" to yourself a bit more than, "what if...". It's highly recommended.

Healthy/meal food of the month: Homemade smoothies/juices.

I have been getting back into the habit of making a quick smoothie in the morning. I pack mine with goodies like spinach, oats, bananas, a green powder and then whizz up with some orange juice and a splash of dairy-free milk. This makes sure that I never miss breakfast on days where I am up too early to eat or am rushing from place to place. I'm not one of those people who can go without food, but I struggle to eat a lot really early in the morning before leaving for uni/work. I am also hopeless without a full stomach, so I always have something mid-morning if I've only had a smoothie to start.

I may do a blog-post on my favourite smoothie recipes, so if that's something you want to read - let me know.

Lesson of the month: It's never good to avoid or suppress things.

Fairly obvious lesson really. And while it has been a fantastic month, it's also been a very emotional one. I've cried three times today (very unlike me) - and I think that's not going to remain just three by the end of today. But that's okay. When sadness or upset bubbles up, it's good to feel that emotion. The same goes for if you feel angry or happy. It can often happen when someone asks you how you are or says "you don't seem yourself", and suddenly you realise you've been feeling upset, or bottling up emotions and then 'boom' - you're getting a bit teary in the middle of a meeting, or by a coffee machine, or in a stairwell, or on Waterloo Bridge and having to be shown photos of puppies and kittens to cheer you up because you are hosting a lunch in less than fifteen minutes...or some other entirely fictional scenario...
It's sometimes only when people who know you ask "how are you?" and want to know the true answer that you realise you haven't asked yourself that, or been making sure you are okay.

There have been highs and lows this month - my last ever hospital appointment being an example of both. What I think is important is that, especially when you are going through a period of significant life change or dealing with difficulties (like I currently am) - it's important to allow yourself to process all of that. It doesn't help you or anyone to just keep going and pretending nothing is happening. Or distracting yourself with other people's problems, and ignoring your own.

Confronting an issue, or an obstacle is really healthy and means that you can hopefully reach a resolution and some inner peace. Self-compassion is key - and learning to allow yourself to grieve, get angry, cry, shout, stomp your feet, laugh hysterically or all the above is vital. I also think it can send a really positive message to yourself if you recognise that your emotions matter just as much as other peoples. If you are feeling upset, it isn't silly - as I found myself saying to a couple of friends today. It's important to care for yourself and not devalue your reactions to things.

Healthy thing(s) to do: Being honest, congruent and bold.

This would be one of the points, if I had been filming the Month In Review as I used to, when I would rabbit on for a solid ten minutes. Instead - I want to leave the healthy things to do simple:

Being honest (to the best of your ability) with yourself and others is one of life's essentials - for me anyway. Telling the truth, and confronting the reality of life can feel scary, and sometimes you have to be brave and just be honest (see a parallel above with my quote of the month...). There's nothing worse than being lied to or lying to yourself.

Being congruent creates peace and harmony, not only within yourself, but in your relationships with others.

Being bold feels freeing and empowering - feelings that are pretty magical in combination.

Goal for the next month: Feel more centred, do some more exercise and keep on being bold.

How has January gone for you? What are your goals for February?

How to get in touch (and all that social media stuff)

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Anniversary - three years on from hospital...

So...it's 5th August and that means *drum roll* it's time for another emotional/personal post marking my (this time) THREE year anniversary after being discharged from hospital.

I will start this post with the same preface as the last two years "I have just written a 'status update' on my personal Facebook page to my friends and it occurred to me that I also want to say thank you to all of YOU. So I'm going to paste in what I wrote word-for-word on here. 
This isn't something I thought I would ever feel comfortable doing. I try to keep Life In Recovery and my personal life reasonably separate. Not because I am ashamed of the blog but because I think it works better if I don't use this as a platform to air my private life and that I use my past and present experiences in a constructive way to help others who may be struggling. That won't be changing.Keeping this blog, creating videos and posting little (or a lotta) bits on Twitter has been an absolutely wonderful experience. I hope to continue the work I have only just started and love interacting and discovering all of you 'out there.' This is why I felt it was relevant to post the message I sent to my friends and family to you all as well."

For the full effect (and for the new readers amongst you) you can read my first year anniversary post here and my second here.

Here we go:

"WARNING – another of my soppy anniversary posts (read: essays). Today is August 5^th, and marks three years since I was discharged from hospital.

This year the anniversary feels quite a different beast to the last two years. It crept up on me, for a start. I completely forgot about it until I was on my way into work yesterday and panicked that I’d somehow missed it. Personally, I think this is a great sign; a sign that I am starting to feel more space between me and the years I spent unwell. A ‘healthy’ space. A space that means I feel I am not completely defined by a decade-plus of illness. A space that feels good.

This past year has been another roller-coaster of a ride. Yes, I still have to be careful. Yes, I’m still finding my way. No, I won’t forget what happened or pretend it didn’t. No, I won’t take things for granted. This year there have been tears and triumphs. Things to grieve over, and things to rejoice about. Things I have done for the first time, and things I have done for the last. There have been people I have said goodbye to, and many people I have met for the first time. We have worked, we have played, we have studied and we have lived. For all these things and so many more, I am grateful.

On this day, three years ago I woke with the knowledge that a new and exciting chapter of life was just beginning. Three years later, I woke up this morning with the same knowledge.

Sitting here typing this (fairly un-edited stream of consciousness) with tears running down my face – I am completely at a loss to express how much I (still) feel about the last few years and the time I was unwell. I have so many of you to thank. So many of you who helped me reach where I am today. So many who are helping me discover just how incredible and exhilarating life can be.

A year of milestones, surprises, new beginnings, goodbyes, change, love, laughter, tears, family, new and old friends. A year of growing, learning and maturing. A year you have all been part of. And for that I am very lucky.

I will quote my post from last year, “To the friends and family who have seen up close the changes these past couple of years have brought and who've been there with a solid shoulder, a helping hand, a beaming smile or a thumbs up - thank you”.

Life. Is. Good."

What anniversaries do you mark? Are you a fan of reflecting on milestones or key moments of your life?

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Remembrance Day 2015: We Will Remember Them

Tomorrow - 11th November at 11:00 - marks the anniversary of the end of World War 1. At 11am the country will go silent for two minutes, in respect and in memory of all who lost their lives.

I had the enormous privilege of singing at the Royal Albert Hall on Saturday for the Festival of Remembrance.
As part of the events that mark the anniversary of the end of the First World War a concert is held at the Royal Albert Hall. The choir I sing with were asked to act as a chorus and backing vocals for the incredible and moving selection of music being performed. I have added some behind-the-scenes videos and pictures from the dress rehearsal, which I think show how amazing the event was.

It was an incredibly moving and emotional day; hearing the stories of survivors and the heartbreaking impact of injury, illness and bereavement.

It was also a day of celebration and thanksgiving; a chance to show the strength and resilience our forces have and say thank you to those who put their lives at risk.

On a personal note, it was an emotional day - tissues were needed at times! It also brought home to me the physical progress I have made in the last year. I performed last year in the same concerts, however, it is a very long day - starting at 06:30 and finishing at 22:00. It had been a real struggle to find the energy throughout the day last time around. However, this year, despite working a full week, my stamina held up and I thoroughly enjoyed each moment. It is moments and days like these that bring home and crystallise how far my recovery has come. Often, like on Saturday, I need to be reminded of how far I've come. So I must thank those who are closest to me for helping me digest and celebrate the progress of the last year. It never hurts to look back a little, take stock and appreciate how things can move onwards and upwards!

The efforts and dedication of our armed forces are often taken for granted. Sometimes their human stories are lost. To have the chance to not only see the talent, majesty and truth of these amazing people while being told some of their stories made for a day I will never forget.

In the words of John Maxwell Edmunds - "When you go Home, tell them of us and say, For your Tomorrow, we gave our Today”

We will remember them.

How to get in touch:

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Work: How to apply for a job if you've been chronically ill

If you've got to the stage where your health permits you to seek out work, then this video contains some helpful guidance on how to frame your ill-health.

Useful Links:

http://www.theguardian.com/careers/careers-blog/disclosing-illness-to-employer

http://www.reed.co.uk/career-advice/blog/2013/march/how-to-explain-a-gap-in-your-cv

http://www.irishjobs.ie/careeradvice/writing-a-cv-if-you-have-been-long-term-unemployed-or-on-long-term-sick-leave/

http://www.michaelpage.co.uk/career-centre/cover-letter-and-cv-advice/how-to-explain-gaps-in-employment-on-your-cv

I really hope you enjoy watching the videos and that they can help you or someone you know. I would love to hear from you if you have anything you would like to say, so please do leave a comment below.

How to get in touch:

YouTube - http://t.co/CGZBkZnWU2
Twitter - http://www.twitter.com/Recovering_Life
Blog - http://yourlifeinrecovery.blogspot.co.uk/
Email - yourlifeinrecovery@gmail.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Recovering.Life

How to manage Perfectionism and the Pursuit of Perfection

A video about perfectionism and how, in the extreme, it could be detrimental to health and well-being. This video contains some guidance on how to gain a more balanced outlook.

“The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself” - Anna Quindlen.

I really hope you enjoy watching the videos and that they can help you or someone you know. I would love to hear from you if you have anything you would like to say.

How to get in touch:

YouTube - http://t.co/CGZBkZnWU2
Twitter - http://www.twitter.com/Recovering_Life
Blog - http://yourlifeinrecovery.blogspot.co.uk
Email - yourlifeinrecovery@gmail.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Recovering.Life