Wellbeing Basics: Laughing

“Laughter is the best medicine” – one of life’s essential mottos, and more true than you might realise. Laughter boosts your immune system, helps your mood, diminishes your perception of pain and, when shared, can strengthen and create bonds between us: and that’s just the tip of the iceberg…So here’s a piece explaining why we should value our ability to laugh, and why it’s one of life’s most vital (and healing) ‘basics’.

Why is laughter the best medicine?

When we laugh, we release ‘feel good’ endorphins, our ‘happy chemical’ serotonin and also increase the oxygen supply to our vital organs. This creates a general sense of wellbeing, not only in our brains, but throughout our body. Having a proper laugh can affect blood pressure, raise our heart-rate and generally ease tension and stress. Laughing also boosts our immune system – studies have shown that ‘happy thoughts’ can release neuropeptides which help fight stress and illness. I made a video (a long time ago) talking about some of the other health benefits of laughter, including helping combat pain and boosting your (and others’) mood. I also talk about how sharing humour and laughter creates a sense of community and strengthens relationships with others. All in all, there are truly miraculous benefits to laughter.

…but I don’t feel like laughing…

This is a hard one to crack. If you don’t feel happy or relaxed, then the chances are, you’re less likely to want to have a chuckle. However, I would make sure to have some tools on standby for when you need a good giggle, but aren’t in the mood. Does a particular film get you laughing? Do you have a friend who can always, always, always make you roar? Now’s the time to put that DVD in, or call up that friend. You’ll find that once you start laughing, it’s very hard to stop! 

(caveat: obviously, if you are experiencing symptoms of depression or really struggling to summon the desire to laugh – you should speak to a medical professional and/or consider some sort of therapy. I am by no means suggesting that laughter is a cure-all, just a great and natural mood-booster)

Okay, okay – I get it…I should laugh more. But how do I add more laughter to my day-to-day? 

Here’s five ways:

Films/TV Shows:

Do you think a particular comedian or actor is comedy gold? Does one particular TV show tickle your funny bone? Keep a stack of DVDs nearby or record them on TV, so that you can guarantee you’re laughing within minutes.

Other people:

Finding someone who shares your sense of humour, who you can be silly with and share a laugh is so important. Spend time with your favourite people and you’ll find that you all benefit from shared humour. Laughter is infectious – use that fact to your advantage!

YouTube videos:

There are millions and millions of funny YouTube videos, perfectly designed to make you laugh. Does slapstick humour get you going? Does a cat ‘talking’ make you giggle? Do you find video ‘pranks’ that go wrong make you laugh? A fan of innuendo bingo..? The world is your oyster online, so get googling and you’ll be sure to find a video that you can watch during your lunch-break that makes you laugh.

Go to a comedy club:

One of the times I’ve laughed the most (that “I-can’t-breathe-my-face-is-going-to-crack-my-stomach hurts-I-think-I-broke-a-rib” feeling) is when I went to the Comedy Store in London. I highly, highly recommend a night of stand-up or improv to inject some laughter into your life.

Spend time with children or pets:

I find I’m always laughing or smiling when I’m around little ones and furry things. The cute and adorable things they do never fail to amuse me. If you don’t have a pet or a child to hand – borrow one! You’ll do your friends a massive favour by offering to walk their dogs or babysit their children, and you gain a lot too!

Do you make time to laugh? What do you find really funny? Has your sense of humour changed? Are you struggling to find things to laugh at right now? Let us know…

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Month In Review: MARCH 2018

Word/quote of the month: "Work hard, play hard"

This has been the month that was.
That was full of work, full of fun, full of friends and just plain full-on. The last three March-es have been similar in that they have had potentially a little bit too much going on in them. Last year I spoke about burning the candle at both ends - which you can watch here, and the year before that I spoke about balance which can be found here. Leaving aside the fact that I don't seem to learn lessons very quickly (!) I think this is a problem with the modern world where we try and cram too much into our days and nights. We can often feel guilty for not constantly working or moving forward, we can often feel that we need to stay busy to cover up insecurities, we can often feel like we 'need' to be doing 'stuff' so that we aren't left with our own company and we can often feel like we just can't say no, or are too tempted so we say yes. Whatever the reason, I think it's worth remembering that it's just as important to take some time out as to be busy. It's important to be able to switch off and just be.
If we are relentlessly pursuing something, always reaching, always planning the next five activities, then we can forget to enjoy the now. Plus, it is very easy to burn out. I decided to take a couple of evenings off this week, and feel so much the better for it. Having had something on every night for weeks and weeks, and my days filled with studying and work, something had to give. And I didn't want it to be my health or my sanity. So kids, the phrase of the month may be: work hard, play hard - and boy is it fun to live by that...but maybe we should also add rest and relax to that, so that we can enjoy the work and the play for longer.


Healthy meal/food of the month: SOUP

It's been cold - bitterly so. We have had blizzards in London and the weather has made us all want to hibernate. That means one thing, and one thing only, is the perfect lunch: soup.
Nothing beats a bowl or mug full of hot soup with a hunk of bread to dip in. I always like to have a home-made and good quality veg or chicken stock on hand to make my own soup; but shop-bought is equally pleasing and comforting (and more convenient at times).

Lesson of the month: Communication is key

Not a new lesson, but one that keeps cropping up lately, so I think it is worth noting down. This month (and the last couple) have continued to test my communication skills, and show the importance of them. Whether you are struggling with family issues, arguing with a friend, trying to keep in touch long-distance, giving a speech at work, doing an interview or trying to get to know someone or something...communication is key. Obviously communication goes both ways - it's awful when just one party is making all the effort or you're banging your head against a brick wall, but I think it is so important to be able to say what you feel and think and tackle issues head on.

Bite the bullet and say you don't agree with someone. Swallow your pride and admit you don't know what is going on. Tamp down your fear and ask that burning question.
See something silly that reminds you of a friend? Send them a voice note or a picture. Miss someone? Tell them! Want to see someone more? Ask them to hang out! Intrigued about an opportunity? Ask someone who knows! Worried about something? Try and get to the bottom of it! Avoiding an issue? Think about how to solve it!

They say your vibe attracts your tribe, and this month I have been reminded again just how awesome my tribe is - and I've been spending a lot of time with my friends. I want to keep them in my life. And  to do that you have to put in effort, even when things are a bit tough, or when you're busy, or stressed. As I said earlier, communication needs to be mutual - so, having said all of that, sometimes it is important to know when you're flogging a dead horse - sometimes it is the wiser, healthier and better choice to let things lie. Reserve your energy for the people who, and the things that, reflect your energy back; and are positive influences in your life that make you feel good. Don't pour your energy and time into something or someone that won't do the same for you. It's a hard lesson, but an important one to learn, and something I've spoken about a lot - here in May 2017 and here in October 2017.

I think the ultimate lesson is: however scared or worried or bored or complacent or angry you are - making yourself communicate and connect with those around you is really important. It can be healing and enlivening, it can shift and change your world for the better. You are in charge; you pick who and what you want in your life; say what that is, and I think you'll be happily surprised by the result. And don't accept less than you deserve or less than you want from life. Communicate what that is - and the chances are, you will get it, or attract it, or make it happen.


Healthy thing to do: RELAX

As I have intimated - it has been a whirlwind of a month, and I am in desperate need of some relaxation time - I think a lot of us are. I even wrote a blog post on it in March. So if you're interested in reading more about the art of relaxation and how important it is to have time out then read it here.
March can often be a month where people get run down, ill and depleted. Taking time to relax, and prioritising some 'down time' can help re-centre an re-balance you and send yourself the right messages.


Goal for the next month: Revision, rest and regaining the gym

April is revision season, so I can't escape the fact that I'm going to be chained to my computer/desk/revision notes. However, I learned a lot last year about factoring in breaks and getting some exercise too, so that is the goal.


What has March held for you? Any lessons learned?

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Wellbeing Basics: Breathing

The second in my Wellbeing Basics series. The first one on sleep can be found here.

Here's a blonde joke (disclaimer: as a blonde-ish person myself I feel I am allowed to make one…sort of) - A blonde walks into a beauty shop with a pair of headphones on. She asks for a haircut. The blonde is led to a chair and asked to sit down. "Make my hair look good, but whatever you do, don't take off the headphones", the blonde instructs. The blonde falls asleep during the haircut and the hair stylist thinks, "It’s really hard to cut with these headphones on". She takes them off, and the blonde dies. The stylist calls an ambulance and when they take the blonde away the intrigued stylist picks up the headphones and takes a listen. She hears a little voice saying "Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out..." So now you all know (if you hadn’t guessed already) that breathing is rather important – and you can actually be doing it wrong!

Why should I care about my breathing so much?

Apart from the obvious (see above), our breathing – or more importantly the way we breathe – can have a big impact on, not only our bodies, but also our emotions. Breathing is an automatic mechanism. It’s controlled by our autonomic nervous system and we don’t have to consciously think about breathing in and out. Because our bodies are incredibly clever, our autonomic nervous system adjusts our breathing to suit our body’s needs. If we are exerting ourselves, if we are anxious, if we are ill – our breathing changes as a result. This can be very helpful. However, it can also sometimes be unhelpful. Over-breathing (or hyperventilation) can upset our body’s chemistry and in turn result in negative physical and emotional symptoms. The opposite problem – hypoventilation (breathing too slowly) can result in too much carbon dioxide being in the blood and not enough oxygen. Studies have shown that there is a high correlation between ‘incorrect’ breathing and a number of illnesses, for example: heart disease, high blood pressure, insomnia, chronic inflammation, anxiety – to name but a few.

Someone told me I’m breathing from the wrong place – how is that possible?

We know that breathing too quickly or too slowly can be unhelpful, but it also matters where you’re breathing from. This may sound odd, but a lot of people breathe from the ‘wrong’ place.

Here’s a simple test to check: if you take a minute or so and concentrate on your breathing what part of your body is rising and falling? Are your chest and shoulders moving, or is your abdomen?

If your chest and shoulders are rising and falling, this probably means you aren’t using your diaphragm (a huge, dome-shaped muscle at the bottom of the rib cage) to breathe. The diaphragm is the best place to breathe from. Chest breathing can mean you feel anxious a lot of the time, that you’re over-breathing and causing potential imbalances to your body chemistry. Disproportionate amounts of oxygen and carbon dioxide can have a radical impact on your health – meaning you can feel fatigued, nervy or cross; while potentially doing yourself more serious damage in the long run.

I find the most helpful way to calm myself is to concentrate on my stomach and breathe from there. Think of your abdomen as a balloon that’s slowly filling up with air as you inhale and then slowly releasing the air (or deflating the balloon) as you exhale – try to do this without your chest or shoulders rising. Another option is to lie flat on the floor or your bed and place a book on your stomach, covering your belly button, and try to lift the book by breathing in and out – this can help focus your mind on exactly where you should be breathing from. Attempt to make your stomach bigger (vanity will have to be out aside!) – this way your body will learn to breathe from your diaphragm rather than your chest.

Many people can find it a slightly uncomfortable or strange experience to change their breathing pattern – but I would suggest you try it and keep persevering! You may feel sleepy at first, or get some funny flutterings in your diaphragm – these are all part of your body adapting to quite a significant change to its norm. It is, however, a positive change. If you can practice this technique for a couple of minutes a day, you will slowly start to breathe from your diaphragm reaping the rewards, both physically and emotionally, as a result.

Five tips to breathe in a healthier way:

·       Join a choir – you will learn all about breath control and diaphragmatic breathing, plus it can be a fun and rewarding activity!

·       Try 7/11 breathing for five to ten minutes every day – that’s inhaling for seven seconds and then exhaling for eleven seconds, this can help regulate your breathing and re-balance your body chemistry.

·       Be more mindful – we can unconsciously hold our breath when we are anxious, angry, concentrating or exerting ourselves; try to be more aware of your breath and how you are breathing – I talk a little about breathing in an old video of mine here (at about 9 and a half minutes in).

·       Practice yoga or Tai Chi – a lot of yoga and Tai Chi exercises include breathing techniques which may prove beneficial, plus you’re getting some exercise at the same time; it’s a win, win really!

·       Download a breathing app – it may sound very close to the blonde joke I opened with, but they can be very useful as a guide if you need to quickly regulate your breathing or calm down – I’ve been using Breathing Zone, but there are lots of free options which I am sure are just as helpful. I talked a bit about Breathing Zone in this video here.

Do you breathe using your diaphragm? What are some things you find helpful to regulate your breathing?

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Wellbeing Basics: Sleeping

“Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together” said Thomas Dekker, a writer in the Elizabethan times. And boy, was he right! Sleep (or lack thereof) is such a hot topic. Recently, the world has started waking up (pun intended) to the fact that getting good quality sleep is one of the foundations of a healthy life. This article will try to answer a few of the most common questions about sleep and hopefully help you to get a better night’s rest - one of the basics of wellbeing, and my first piece in the series.

Why is sleep so important anyway?

Sleep improves not only your physical health, but your emotional health too. Studies have shown that adequate sleep can help aid memory, reduce inflammation, improve our immune system, boost our ability to learn, improve mood and so much more. Chronic sleep deprivation (regularly getting less sleep than you need) is becoming a global issue. The impact of not getting the optimum amount of sleep can be serious. One study has found that not getting enough sleep is more dangerous to your health than smoking, having high blood pressure or heart disease. While this may sound like scare-mongering, lack of sleep (or sleep debt) can seriously impact your quality of life.  For example, you may find that you put on weight, are less able to focus, feel anxious or get ill more often if you are in a state of sleep debt.

What are the different phases of sleep; what do they mean for me?

There has been a lot of research into sleep and the theories are still developing, but the general consensus is that there are a few different stages of sleep.

One of these is REM (Rapid Eye Movement). This type of sleep is the most ‘active’ part of your sleep – this is thought to be the stage where you dream. In REM sleep, your brain can be as active as it is when you are awake. Your brain is not only processing the events of the day, but also doing a bit of ‘waste management’ by clearing away toxins and strengthening/weakening connections in our brain.

Another kind of sleep is NREM (Non-Rapid Eye Movement). This can be further broken down into four stages. Essentially, the last two stages of NREM are the deepest parts of your sleep. This is when your body heals and restores itself. Hormones are released which build muscle, energy is replenished, tissues are healed, blood pressure and heart rate drops.

Hopefully this shows you that, far from being a waste of time, sleep is a key component in rebuilding, renewing and maintaining a healthy and happy life.

Why is eight hours considered the ‘magic’ number?

There is a theory (much touted) that eight hours is the perfect amount of sleep to have. However, this theory is being challenged. Some people seem to need less, some more. There is such a thing as sleeping too much; this can actually be as harmful as not getting enough sleep.

How much sleep we need can depend on many things such as our age, life events, and illness. I think the answer to this question lies with the individual. Ask yourself if you feel at your best with five…seven…ten hours of sleep. If your answer is different from the amount you usually get, then something needs to change for you to get your optimum amount of sleep.

I can’t get to sleep – how do I sort this out?

Our modern day lives are not allowing us to get enough sleep, but they also are damaging our ability to ‘wind down’ and switch off. Sleep hygiene is a new-ish concept and I made a video talking about some simple habits to help improve sleep here.

With our addiction to the internet and smart phones it’s incredibly easy to remain hyper-active and alert during the hour or so before bedtime. We bring TVs and phones into our bedrooms which, I believe, are one of the main causes of not being able to get to sleep. Screens emit blue light which cause our body’s circadian rhythm (our body clock) to malfunction. Blue light can interfere with the production of melatonin, the hormone that regulates sleep. If you don’t feel tired, the chances are that you’ve been late-night texting or watching your favourite series on Netflix in the wee hours. If you need to use your screens in the evening, you can download f.lux – free software that adjusts the light levels on your screen and helps reduce the impact of blue light.

Eating a sensible meal before bed can also help a lot. Avoid fatty, starchy, sugary foods and make sure you eat enough. If you feel peckish in the night – get up and eat something like a banana.

Regular exercise is important in helping you sleep. Just don’t exercise too near bedtime as this can stimulate you and interfere with your body clock. If you want to do some exercise near bedtime, I would recommend light stretching or yoga, as this isn’t too strenuous and can prove relaxing.

Worry and stress can certainly play a big role in being ready for sleep. While there are a lot of things that can help you relax, one of the best things to do is to have a pad of paper and a pen by your bed. If something is really exercising your mind, write it down, get it out of your head and address it in the morning. This way you shouldn’t have to spend all night ruminating over it, or worrying you’ll forget something.

If I only did three things to help sleep better what would they be?

• Set yourself a cut-off time for electronics – e.g. "from 10pm I won’t look at my phone until the morning or watch TV."
• Have a relaxing routine at the end of your day: take a bath; make a cup of herb tea; read a chapter of a book; have a chat to a loved one. This creates a lovely ritual and can help you wind down and relax, meaning it’s easier for you to settle at bedtime.
• Keep your bedroom clutter-free, calm and cool as your bedroom has to be conducive to sleep. Having a messy and chaotic room can result in you feeling the same way!

How much sleep do you get a night? Have you got any tips that mean you get your forty winks?

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